Fill In The Blank Stare

Fun new blog gaaaaaaaame!

Scene:

An LB hits a TE during regulation play, both are 1. active roster players who are 2. listed active during 3. active, REAL-TIME play.

Quote (Hammond, Mayock):

"Looked to me like that was a legal hit, happened before they blew the whistle."

"Well if it had been the quarterback it wouldn't've been legal"

Factually accurate but logically beyond useless, even misleading! TO WIT:

"Looked to me like that was a legal hit, happened before they blew the whistle."

"Well if it had been [former National Football League head coach Wade Phillips] it wouldn't've been legal."

"Looked to me like that was a legal hit, happened before they blew the whistle."

"Well if it had been [Mary Todd Lincoln] it wouldn't've been legal."

"Looked to me like that was a legal hit, happened before they blew the whistle."

"Well if it had been [Lassie] it wouldn't've been legal."

The churro vendor? DUMBLEDORE? Half the distance to the goal, canary party central. Reasonable! But QB protection in the league makes any sort of player comparison (aside from kicker, fine you people) kind of an apples to sacks of lunchmeat situation. I guess you could use both during regulation? Whatever, fuck you

"It's Attitude, Not Aptitude, That Determines Altitude."

No. No it's fucking not. It's goddamn sports, not the inane admissions slogan from your safety school. I don't know who said this tonight, and it doesn't even matter, because it could've been any single one of them. You people. I mean this what, sentiment?, is not myth, it's not narrative, it's not funny ha-ha and it's not funny interesting. Fuck you. In the world of idealism paraded as fact, this is the untethered turkey balloon of all turkey balloons.